-----Original Message-----
From: James Floyd [mailto:jfloyd@airnet.net]
Sent: Monday, December 21, 1998 3:02 PM
To: jfloyd@airnet.net
Subject: Chanukah Uncovered
Ladies and gentlemen, it is Sunday morning here and finally the
shelling has stopped on both the eastern and western fronts
(Washington and Baghdad) in this 'War of the Crotches.'
And in a few hours National Pubic Radio, a state supported Khazar
J-w organization, will bless us all with another in-depth history
and explanation of Hanukkah. Thank you Lord for the gift of timing.
Jesus must now compete with a potato patty
The Hanukkah Story
Chanukah as you know it was conceived in anger and hate of Christ
and forced upon J-ws who thought Christmas," was a holiday worth
celebrating", and thought, "it was just too bad that G-d had
deprived the poor J-ws of taking part in such a meaningful and
beautiful experience."
The villain in this enterprise was Rabbi Julius Eckman who in
1866 took the most minor of all J-wish holidays, Chanukah, the
only one that is post-Biblical, but the only one that occurs in
December, and made it a major holiday in a valiant effort to
combat the Christmas Spirit.'
Eckman officiated in a number of Southern congregations and
was appalled at J-ws and Christians exchanging gifts and "the
illumination of their parlors in such an injudicious celebration."
This mamzer took his venom with him to San Francisco where he
assaulted anyone guilty of "such a want of taste" rarely shown
by "families of education and refinement." His rabid ravings
were directed at those J-ws whom he called, "ignorant fathers"
and "mothers whom nature intended to fill positions as honorable
housewives in the kitchen, but whom fortune, by her freaks, had
misplaced into the parlor." These J-wish mothers, whom
according to the Rabbi, should have remained barren cooks,
"betray their littleness of mind and their misplacement of fortune
by playing such a ridiculous part as to be aping Christmas".
This Khazar with no blood-line traceable to Judah 'the hammer'
Maccabaeus created a permanent animosity between J-w and Christian
that will unfortunately last forever and worsen each year. This
Herculean accomplishment was the result of his use of vile
name-calling directed at those who would dare disagree with his
silliness. A J-w who delighted in Christmas was "contemptible"
and the reason for their conduct was because of the "imbecility of
their parents", who were "playing the pygmy while they should prove
themselves giants", by rejecting all things Christmas.
So we have here the history of a damnable hate-monger who
single-handedly placed upon his own people a guilt-trip because
they experienced feelings of love and joy along with Christians
at this wonderful time of the year.
This Jesus-hater's vileness at first had little visible effect
upon J-ws, however, they would later do such strange things as
place a star of David atop their trees and call it a "Chanukah
bush" to allay this 'Eckmanic' guilt.
Today many are so depressed, at this their most unhappy time of
the year, that they must have psychiatric help. Thank you Julius.
Ref. Jewish Frontier , Dec. 1963, pp. 29 -31, Joys of Jewish
Folklore, Eichhorn, pg. 445.
Rebbi Jim 'Chaya' Floyd
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