Sting, Stang, Stung

Jim Floyd

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Date: Tue, 11 Jan 2000 10:02:17 -0600 (CST
From: James Floyd (jfloyd@hiwaay.net)
Subject: Sting, Stang, Stung 


     Last evening, at about three minutes pass seven o'clock, I 
   decided that 'the problem' is not the little, illegal, wet-backs 
   who are flooding into Alabama, also, I now know that 'the 
   problem' is not the greedy, treasonous, businessmen who 
   take full advantage of this cheap labor.

      No, both groups are acting-out a very natural role in this
    comic, human drama.

      'The problem', in my beloved South, is the same as it has 
    been since 1865.  Oh yes, it was bad in 65!  We had drunk, 
    barefooted, Negroes occupying the state house, eating 
    peanuts, fist fighting and throwing food at each other.  We 
    had Thaddeus Stevens, scalawags, carpetbaggers, Union 
    League Clubs,  all working together with other political 
    parasites, looters, knaves and fools, to destroy the South.

       Last night, at seven o'clock, at the bi-monthly Cullman City 
    Counsel meeting, our 'New South' leaders exhibited what 
    any thinking-person would conclude to be a continuation of 
    the Thaddeus Stevens, postwar government.

       And, last night, history was made at this meeting.  It was the 
    shortest meeting in the history of this city.  I arrived a few 
    seconds after it open, only to find that it was over, closed! 
    And there were snide little grins on all faces except those of 
    the TV people.  Surely, they were wondering why they had 
    assembled their equipment for such a ridiculously short session.

       Well, let me tell you why.  They knew I was coming and they 
    knew what I would say, and they knew that the TV would 
    carry what I said, and they didn't want it said, and they didn't 
    want the citizens of Cullman to hear it.  They saw that I wasn't 
    there and gleefully open and closed the meeting almost in the 
    same breath.

       Early in the day, the Cullman County Commission had not 
    fared so well.  I got to this meeting, unannounced, just in time 
    to take the microphone and smile at the camera;

    from memory;

         Good morning, I don't know about you but I am embarrassed 
    that our new Federal Post Office is being built by illegal immigrants. 
    I am offended that there are seventeen Mexicans standing on a 
    scaffold within a stone's throw, or taco's toss, of your offices.  I 
    am ashamed that our tax money is going to a treasonous general 
    and sub-contractor.

        How do I know they are illegal? The two on the far end still have 
    river moss, in their hair, from the Rio Grande. What did you say? 
    You can't do anything?  Oh! That is exactly what the project manager, 
    in Atlanta, told me.  That's what the Chief of Police told me, and 
    the health department, and the Social Security agent, et. al. 
    Nobody can do nothing, anything, double, triple negative, nothing!

      And it's not just the Post Office. They are still raising the roofs 
    at Wallace College and they are paving the back-road to the college. 
    So, why am I telling you all this?  George, (County Commissioner) 
    well, for one thing, I can't talk to mosquitoes.

      In addition to the degrading impact of this situation upon the well 
    being of our workers and their feelings of self-worth, there is the 
    ever alarming danger of illegal immigrants coming here without 
    medical screening or a protecting policy of quarantining. These 
    people who are violating our campus, our city and county, are 
    known to carry, in their blood stream or lungs, everything from 
    Dengue fever, to rubella, to malaria, and a strain of tuberculosis 
    which is immune to any treatment.

      So, what we are doing is leaving to chance the health of our 
    children and entire community.  We are gambling that when the 
    mosquitoes come out this spring that they will carefully avoid 
    biting an infected illegal and then passing that blood on to our 
    kids.

       Of course, I know no way to appeal to mosquitoes, so, I am asking 
    you to do something about this dangerous and unacceptable situation.

       And so it goes and so it went. The next Counsel meeting is two 
    weeks away and the brick at the new Post Office will be finished, 
    this crew of illegal  invaders will be off Main Street and our 
    poltroonish leaders can, again, hold lengthy meetings and ruminate 
    about how much good they are doing for our community that they love 
    so very much.

        Meanwhile, if there is anyone out there who knows how to talk to 
    mosquitoes, please, call me.  Come to think of it, I had rather talk 
    to an honest mosquito anyway!

         
                                         Jim Floyd


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