Born: Nicholas Jameson on 1/15/99
I.Q.: 120 (estimated - tests are forbidden)
Attended: King Beating Elementary from 9/2004 - 6/2012 (held back
1 full year for: "imperfect tolerance");
Morris Dees Middle School from 9/2012 - 6/2015 (some
disciplinary problems);
Holocaust High from 9/2015 - 6/2018 (was member of the
stage crew at the Simon Wiesenthal Center for the
Performing Arts; good grades, but no scholarships
available for "uncoloured heteromales");
Local Community College from 8/2018 - 7/2020 (borrowed
$20,000 for 2 yr. Costs and worked odd jobs); and
State University from 9/2020 - 3/2022 (graduated early
with B.S. in Physical Geography - but still had to
borrow another $45,000 for 2 yrs. costs).
Work Experience:
Matshita Corporation from 9/2022 - 9/2026, cleaned
toilets at $7/hr.; and from 9/2026 - 9/2029 supervised
the cleaning of toilets at $9.50/hr.;
Unemployed from 9/2029 to 3/2031 (laid off after Matshita
was bought out by Dung);
Whorewitz Consulting from 3/2031 to 4/2035 (office go-fer
at $7.50/hr., for which Mr. Whorewitz claimed $75/hr. on
his consulting contracts); and from 4/2035 to 1/2039
("executive assistant" go-fer at $10/hr., for which
Whorewitz claims $100/hr. on consulting contracts)
Other: Pending marriage broken-up 12/2029 (bankruptcy finalized
9/2030);
Married Greta Martinez 5/2036 (blonde and half-Mexican, but
frankly hates that part of her ancestry!), no children;
Greta's baby brother gets out of the Amerisraeli International
Peacekeeping Army and comes to stay with us 12/2038 (he sure
has a lot of illegal weapons, but he is family!);
and now...................................................
TODAY is 1/15/2039, my 40th Birthday. Mr Whorewitz asked me to
sexually service his aged client Beulah Gomez-Patel to get a contract
amendment. I refused and he fired me. I went home, got some weapons
from Greta's brother's room, and left her a message before returning.
So far I've killed Mr. Whorewitz and about 60 others..............
The gas is getting close, Greta. Where did I go wrong?...........
Where did we go wrong?
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