Forgive Us Our Usurers

by Jim Floyd


ParaJesus was on Capitol Hill, last week. He had His whip in hand, and as in days of old, He went after the extortionists, the bloodsuckers, the parasites, the money changers.

ParaOh, dear hearts, it was awful! The Senate of the United (?) States of America and the financial dis-services industry snatched His home-made whip from His hand and beat the living hell out of Him.

ParaForgive us our debts? Get real, said the Senators!

ParaJesus now faces hate crime charges, because of the race of the swindlers, three counts involving destruction of public money-changers tables, and sedition.

ParaThe majority of the Senate said that Jesus was, "...trying to take away from working people a source of credit that they needed even if they were charged 400%, 500%, 2000% interest."

ParaThese Senators went even further and declared that they and their money-lending-benefactors were the good guys, and Jesus and His crowd were bent on taking "unfair advantage" of these poor loan-sharks.

ParaFellow sufferers, the Senate has established that the bankers, credit card companies, S&Ls, even paycheck cashing super-thieves are good, decent folks.

ParaYou and your children are the problem. You are "irresponsible."

ParaYou should be like Congress and the bankers, yes, let's be like them, "responsible."

ParaWell, Jesus is too nice a fellow to say all that needs to be said about this stupid bankruptcy legislation, and perhaps it is presumptuous of me, even irreligious, to interject my rantings, but that never stopped me before, so may I begin by asking;

Have you sick-minded, spendthrift, profligate, rakes forgotten that, under King George II, working people bailed-out the S&Ls, banks, Wall Street speculators and every other sorry piece of irresponsible, money grubbing, human waste that got in trouble?

Have you forgotten the banking doctrine of "too big to fail."

Have you duplicitous, scabrous hypocrites forgotten the Capitol Hill bank scandal? The bank that you good, responsible, people busted and forced to close. Bad checks floating like septic, smelly, flotsam all through those hallowed chambers -- have you no conscience, at long last, have you no conscience?

You were forgiven without penalty! Out here in the real world, if an elderly lady writes a bad check for a couple dollars she is charged twenty eight dollars, instantly, and without exception.

You sorry sons of bitches forced us to bail-out Mexico, and now, you are telling working people that they don't deserve a second chance because they are "irresponsible?"

ParaBrothers and sisters, I ain't sending a copy of this sermon to congress, as is my wont, because it is useless to appeal to these simple stooges who are doing the biddings of their supernaturally powerful masters.

ParaThis past week's legislation was not a giant step for mankind but a giant stepping on mankind. The systematic destruction of this once great nation rolls inexorably onward.

ParaVanity of vanities, oh the futility of it all, how can we expect government to stop usury, when the entire system depends upon it? They live, not from week to week as do most working people, but from day to day. Each morning, every morning, 365 days a year, they borrow one billion dollars from Shylock to pay Shylock, just the interest on Antonio's bond.

ParaThe last thing Senator Session (D-NY) said was that this is a "moral issue." Amen, little Jef!

ParaBut are you saying that bankers are noble, virtuous people and debtors are contemptible mountebanks? Should it not give you village idiots pause to know that you voted the same way as did Wall Street's Hillary Clinton?

ParaAnd for this I say, thank you. You rapscallion scalawag Senators did more, during this debate over the new bankruptcy law, to enhance my credibility as a writer than anything imaginable.

ParaThanks, for making it so damn easy for me to convince my fellow indentured servants that there is not a shekel's worth of difference between a damn Democrate and a double-damn Republican!

ParaBefore I close, I have a special prayer request, I want you all to pray that the Lord will lay a guilt trip on the hearts of the management of C-Span and cause them to remove that sign under the names of Senators Shelby and Sessions that tells the world that they are from Alabama. Begorra, it's so damnably humiliating!

ParaI want ya'll to stand up, brothers and sisters, and let us sing that ageless hymn by brother Woody Guthrie, "when I travel this wide world over, I meet lots of funny men -- some will rob you with a six gun, some will use a fountain pen. But as through this world I ramble and through this world I roam, I ain't never seen no outlaw driving families from their homes."

from the Right (most of the time) and not so Reverent,
James Floyd



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